The January Daily Readings from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

January 1 – AM          Page 1, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

      WAR FEVER ran high in the New England town to which we new, young officers from Plattsburg were assigned, and we were flattered when the first citizens took us to their homes, making us feel heroic.  Here was love, applause, war; moments sublime with intervals hilarious.  I was part of life at last, and in the midst of the excitement I discovered liquor.  I forgot the strong warnings and the prejudices of my people concerning drink.  In time we sailed for “Over There.”  I was very lonely and again turned to alcohol.
We landed in England.  I visited Winchester Cathedral.  Much moved, I wandered outside.  My attention was caught by a doggerel on an old tombstone:

“Here lies a Hampshire Grenadier
Who caught his death
Drinking cold small beer.
A good soldier is ne’er forgot
Whether he dieth by musket
Or by pot.”

      Ominous warning—which I failed to heed.

January 1 – PM          Page 30, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

      MOST OF US have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics.  No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows.  Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people.  The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker.  The persistence of this illusion is astonishing.  Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.

January 2 – AM          Page xv, Foreword To Second Edition (1955)

FOREWORD TO SECOND EDITION

Figures given in this foreword describe the
Fellowship as it was in 1955

      SINCE the original Foreword to this book was written in 1939, a wholesale miracle has taken place.  Our earliest printing voiced the hope “that every alcoholic who journeys will find the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous at his destination.  Already,” continues the early text, “twos and threes and fives of us have sprung up in other communities.”
Sixteen years have elapsed between our first printing of this book and the presentation in 1955 of our second edition.  In that brief space, Alcoholics Anonymous has mushroomed into nearly 6,000 groups whose membership is far above 150,000 recovered alcoholics.  Groups are to be found in each of the United States and all of the provinces of Canada.  A.A. has flourishing communities in the British Isles, the Scandinavian countries, South Africa, South America, Mexico, Alaska, Australia and Hawaii.  All told, promising beginnings have been made in some 50 foreign countries and U.S. possessions.  Some are just now taking shape in Asia.  Many of our friends encourage us by saying that this is but a beginning, only the augury of a much larger future ahead.

January 2 – PM          Page 58, How It Works, Chapter 5

      RARELY HAVE we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.  Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves.  There are such unfortunates.  They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way.  They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty.  Their chances are less than average.  There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.

January 3 – AM          Page 89, Working With Others, Chapter 7

      PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics.  It works when other activities fail.  This is our twelfth suggestion:  Carry this message to other alcoholics!  You can help when no one else can.  You can secure their confidence when others fail.  Remember they are very ill.
Life will take on new meaning.  To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends—this is an experience you must not miss.  We know you will not want to miss it.  Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.

January 3 – PM          Page 44, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

      IN THE PRECEDING chapters you have learned something of alcoholism.  We hope we have made clear the distinction between the alcoholic and the non—alcoholic.  If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic.  If that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer.
To one who feels he is an atheist or agnostic such an experience seems impossible, but to continue as he is means disaster, especially if he is an alcoholic of the hopeless variety.  To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face.

January 4 – AM          Page 72, Into Action, Chapter 6

      HAVING MADE our personal inventory, what shall we do about it?  We have been trying to get a new attitude, a new relationship with our Creator, and to discover the obstacles in our path.  We have admitted certain defects; we have ascertained in a rough way what the trouble is; we have put our finger on the weak items in our personal inventory.  Now these are about to be cast out.  This requires action on our part, which, when completed, will mean that we have admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being, the exact nature of our defects.  This brings us to the Fifth Step in the program of recovery mentioned in the preceding chapter.

January 4 – PM          Page 104, To Wives, Chapter 8

TO WIVES*

      WITH FEW EXCEPTIONS, our book thus far has spoken of men.  But what we have said applies quite as much to women.  Our activities in behalf of women who drink are on the increase.  There is every evidence that women regain their health as readily as men if they try our suggestions.
But for every man who drinks others are involved—the wife who trembles in fear of the next debauch; the mother and father who see their son wasting away.
Among us are wives, relatives and friends whose problem has been solved, as well as some who have not yet found a happy solution.  We want the wives of Alcoholics Anonymous to address the wives of men who drink too much.  What they say will apply to nearly everyone bound by ties of blood or affection to an alcoholic.

*Written in 1939, when there were few women in A.A., this chapter assumes that the alcoholic in the home is likely to be the husband.  But many of the suggestions given here may be adapted to help the person who lives with a woman alcoholic—whether she is still drinking or is recovering in A.A.  A further source of help is noted on page 121.

January 5 – AM          Page xxv-xxvi, The Doctor’s Opinion

      WE OF Alcoholics Anonymous believe that the reader will be interested in the medical estimate of the plan of recovery described in this book.  Convincing testimony must surely come from medical men who have had experience with the sufferings of our members and have witnessed our return to health.  A well-known doctor, chief physician at a nationally prominent hospital specializing in alcoholic and drug addiction, gave Alcoholics Anonymous this letter:

To Whom It May Concern:
I have specialized in the treatment of alcoholism for many years.
In late 1934 I attended a patient who, though he had been a competent businessman of good earning capacity, was an alcoholic of a type I had come to regard as hopeless.
In the course of his third treatment he acquired certain ideas concerning a possible means of recovery.  As part of his rehabilitation he commenced to present his conceptions to other alcoholics, impressing upon them that they must do likewise with still others.  This has become the basis of a rapidly growing fellowship of these men and their families.  This man and over one hundred others appear to have recovered.
I personally know scores of cases who were of the type with whom other methods had failed completely.
These facts appear to be of extreme medical importance; because of the extraordinary possibilities of rapid growth inherent in this group they may mark a new epoch in the annals of alcoholism.  These men may well have a remedy for thousands of such situations.
You may rely absolutely on anything they say about themselves.

                              Very truly yours,
William D. Silkworth, M.D.

January 5 – PM          Page 125-126, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

      Many alcoholics are enthusiasts.  They run to extremes.  At the beginning of recovery a man will take, as a rule, one of two directions.  He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else.  In either case certain family problems will arise.  With these we have had experience galore.

January 6 – AM          Page 2, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

      I took a night law course, and obtained employment as investigator for a surety company.  The drive for success was on.  I’d prove to the world I was important.  My work took me about Wall Street and little by little I became interested in the market.  Many people lost money—but some became very rich.  Why not I?  I studied economics and business as well as law.  Potential alcoholic that I was, I nearly failed my law course.  At one of the finals I was too drunk to think or write.  Though my drinking was not yet continuous, it disturbed my wife.  We had long talks when I would still her forebodings by telling her that men of genius conceived their best projects when drunk; that the most majestic constructions of philosophic thought were so derived.

January 6 – PM          Page 151, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

      FOR MOST normal folks, drinking means conviviality, companionship and colorful imagination.  It means release from care, boredom and worry.  It is joyous intimacy with friends and a feeling that life is good.  But not so with us in those last days of heavy drinking.  The old pleasures were gone.  They were but memories.  Never could we recapture the great moments of the past.  There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it.  There was always one more attempt—and one more failure.

January 7 – AM          Page 58, How It Works, Chapter 5

      Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now.  If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it—then you are ready to take certain steps.
At some of these we balked.  We thought we could find an easier, softer way.  But we could not.  With all the earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start.  Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.

January 7 – PM          Page 17, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

      WE, OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, know thousands of men and women who were once just as hopeless as Bill.  Nearly all have recovered.  They have solved the drink problem.
We are average Americans.  All sections of this country and many of its occupations are represented, as well as many political, economic, social, and religious backgrounds.  We are people who normally would not mix.  But there exists among us a fellowship, a friendliness, and an understanding which is indescribably wonderful.  We are like the passengers of a great liner the moment after rescue from shipwreck when camaraderie, joyousness and democracy pervade the vessel from steerage to Captain’s table.  Unlike the feelings of the ship’s passengers, however, our joy in escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways.  The feeling of having shared in a common peril is one element in the powerful cement which binds us.  But that in itself would never have held us together as we are now joined.

January 8 – AM          Page 72-73, Into Action, Chapter 6

      This is perhaps difficult—especially discussing our defects with another person.  We think we have done well enough in admitting these things to ourselves.  There is doubt about that.  In actual practice, we usually find a solitary self-appraisal insufficient.  Many of us thought it necessary to go much further.  We will be more reconciled to discussing ourselves with another person when we see good reasons why we should do so.  The best reason first:  If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking.  Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives.  Trying to avoid this humbling experience, they have turned to easier methods.  Almost invariably they got drunk.  Having persevered with the rest of the program, they wondered why they fell.  We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning.  They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock.  They only thought they had lost their egoism and fear; they only thought they had humbled themselves.  But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty, in the sense we find it necessary, until they told someone else all their life story.

January 8 – PM          Page 89, Working with Others, Chapter 7

      Perhaps you are not acquainted with any drinkers who want to recover.  You can easily find some by asking a few doctors, ministers, priests or hospitals.  They will be only too glad to assist you.  Don’t start out as an evangelist or reformer.  Unfortunately a lot of prejudice exists.  You will be handicapped if you arouse it.  Ministers and doctors are competent and you can learn much from them if you wish, but it happens that because of your own drinking experience you can be uniquely useful to other alcoholics.  So cooperate; never criticize.  To be helpful is our only aim.

January 9 – AM          Page 30, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

      We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics.  This is the first step in recovery.  The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking.  We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control.  All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals—usually brief—were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization.  We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness.  Over any considerable period we get worse, never better.

January 9 – PM          Page 104, To Wives, Chapter 8

      As wives of Alcoholics Anonymous, we would like you to feel that we understand as perhaps few can.  We want to analyze mistakes we have made.  We want to leave you with the feeling that no situation is too difficult and no unhappiness too great to be overcome.

January 10 – AM          Page 44, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

      But it isn’t so difficult.  About half our original fellowship were of exactly that type.  At first some of us tried to avoid the issue, hoping against hope we were not true alcoholics.  But after a while we had to face the fact that we must find a spiritual basis of life—or else.  Perhaps it is going to be that way with you.  But cheer up, something like half of us thought we were atheists or agnostics.  Our experience shows that you need not be disconcerted.

January 10 – PM          Page 122-123, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

      Cessation of drinking is but the first step away from a highly strained, abnormal condition.  A doctor said to us, “Years of living with an alcoholic is almost sure to make any wife or child neurotic.  The entire family is, to some extent, ill.”  Let families realize, as they start their journey, that all will not be fair weather.  Each in his turn may be footsore and may straggle.  There will be alluring shortcuts and by-paths down which they may wander and lose their way.
Suppose we tell you some of the obstacles a family will meet; suppose we suggest how they may be avoided—even converted to good use for others.  The family of an alcoholic longs for the return of happiness and security.  They remember when father was romantic, thoughtful and successful.  Today’s life is measured against that of other years and, when it falls short, the family may be unhappy.

January 11 – AM          Page 151, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

      The less people tolerated us, the more we withdrew from society, from life itself.  As we became subjects of King Alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm, the chilling vapor that is loneliness settled down.  It thickened, ever becoming blacker.  Some of us sought out sordid places, hoping to find understanding companionship and approval.  Momentarily we did—then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the hideous Four Horsemen—Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, Despair.  Unhappy drinkers who read this page will understand!

January 11 – PM          Page 169, Pioneers of A.A., Part I

PIONEERS OF A.A.

      Dr. Bob and the twelve men and women who here tell their stories were among the early members of A.A.’s first groups.
All have now passed away of natural causes, having maintained complete sobriety.  The periods of sobriety attained by these thirteen A.A.’s range from fifteen to forty-six years.
Today, hundreds of additional A.A. members can be found who have had no relapse for more than thirty years.
All of these, then, are the pioneers of A.A.  They bear witness that release from alcoholism can really be permanent.

January 12 – AM          Page 58-59, How It Works, Chapter 5

      Remember that we deal with alcoholism—cunning, baffling, powerful!  Without help it is too much for us.  But there is One who has all power—that One is God.  May you find Him now!

January 12 – PM          Page 73, Into Action, Chapter 6

      More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life.  He is very much the actor.  To the outer world he presents his stage character.  This is the one he likes his fellows to see.  He wants to enjoy a certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn’t deserve it.
The inconsistency is made worse by the things he does on his sprees.  Coming to his senses, he is revolted at certain episodes he vaguely remembers.  These memories are a nightmare.  He trembles to think someone might have observed him.  As fast as he can, he pushes these memories far inside himself.  He hopes they will never see the light of day.  He is under constant fear and tension—that makes for more drinking.

January 13 – AM          Page 90, Working With Others, Chapter 7

      When you discover a prospect for Alcoholics Anonymous, find out all you can about him.  If he does not want to stop drinking, don’t waste time trying to persuade him.  You may spoil a later opportunity.  This advice is given for his family also.  They should be patient, realizing they are dealing with a sick person.
If there is any indication that he wants to stop, have a good talk with the person most interested in him—usually his wife.  Get an idea of his behavior, his problems, his background, the seriousness of his condition, and his religious leanings.  You need this information to put yourself in his place, to see how you would like him to approach you if the tables were turned.

January 13 – PM          Page xxii, Foreword To Third Edition (1976)

      BY March 1976, when this edition went to the printer, the total worldwide membership of Alcoholics Anonymous was conservatively estimated at more than 1,000,000, with almost 28,000 groups meeting in over 90 countries.¹
Surveys of groups in the United States and Canada indicate that A.A. is reaching out, not only to more and more people, but to a wider and wider range.  Women now make up more than one-fourth of the membership; among newer members, the proportion is nearly one-third.  Seven percent of the A.A.’s surveyed are less than 30 years of age—among them, many in their teens.²

¹In 1996, over 95,000 groups, with A.A. activity in 146 countries.
²In 1996, one-third are women; about one-fifth, 30 and under.

January 14 – AM          Page 2-3, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

      By the time I had completed the course, I knew the law was not for me.  The inviting maelstrom of Wall Street had me in its grip.  Business and financial leaders were my heroes.  Out of this alloy of drink and speculation, I commenced to forge the weapon that one day would turn in its flight like a boomerang and all but cut me to ribbons.  Living modestly, my wife and I saved $1,000.  It went into certain securities, then cheap and rather unpopular. I rightly imagined that they would some day have a great rise.  I failed to persuade my broker friends to send me out looking over factories and managements, but my wife and I decided to go anyway.  I had developed a theory that most people lost money in stocks through ignorance of markets.  I discovered many more reasons later on.
We gave up our positions and off we roared on a motorcycle, the sidecar stuffed with tent, blankets, a change of clothes, and three huge volumes of a financial reference service.  Our friends thought a lunacy commission should be appointed.  Perhaps they were right.  I had had some success at speculation, so we had a little money, but we once worked on a farm for a month to avoid drawing on our small capital.  That was the last honest manual labor on my part for many a day.  We covered the whole eastern United States in a year.  At the end of it, my reports to Wall Street procured me a position there and the use of a large expense account.  The exercise of an option brought in more money, leaving us with a profit of several thousand dollars for that year.

January 14 – PM          Page 123-124, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

      Now and then the family will be plagued by spectres from the past, for the drinking career of almost every alcoholic has been marked by escapades, funny, humiliating, shameful or tragic.  The first impulse will be to bury these skeletons in a dark closet and padlock the door.  The family may be possessed by the idea that future happiness can be based only upon forgetfulness of the past.  We think that such a view is self-centered and in direct conflict with the new way of living.
Henry Ford once made a wise remark to the effect that experience is the thing of supreme value in life.  That is true only if one is willing to turn the past to good account.  We grow by our willingness to face and rectify errors and convert them into assets.  The alcoholic’s past thus becomes the principal asset of the family and frequently it is almost the only one!

January 15 – AM          Page 162-163, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

      Some day we hope that every alcoholic who journeys will find a Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous at his destination.  To some extent this is already true.  Some of us are salesmen and go about.  Little clusters of twos and threes and fives of us have sprung up in other communities, through contact with our two larger centers.  Those of us who travel drop in as often as we can.  This practice enables us to lend a hand, at the same time avoiding certain alluring distractions of the road, about which any traveling man can inform you.*
Thus we grow.  And so can you, though you be but one man with this book in your hand.  We believe and hope it contains all you will need to begin.

*Written in 1939.  In 1996, there are over 95,000 groups.  There is A.A. activity in 146 countries, with an estimated membership of two million.

January 15 – PM          Page 17, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

      The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution.  We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action.  This is the great news this book carries to those who suffer from alcoholism.

January 16 – AM          Page 45, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

      Lack of power, that was our dilemma.  We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves.  Obviously.  But where and how were we to find this Power?
Well, that’s exactly what this book is about.  Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.  That means we have written a book which we believe to be spiritual as well as moral.  And it means, of course, that we are going to talk about God.  Here difficulty arises with agnostics.  Many times we talk to a new man and watch his hopes rise as we discuss his alcoholic problems and explain our fellowship.  But his face falls when we speak of spiritual matters, especially when we mention God, for we have re-opened a subject which our man thought he had neatly evaded or entirely ignored.

January 16 – PM          Page xv-xvi, Foreword to Second Edition (1955)

      The spark that was to flare into the first A.A. group was struck at Akron, Ohio, in June 1935, during a talk between a New York stockbroker and an Akron physician.  Six months earlier, the broker had been relieved of his drink obsession by a sudden spiritual experience, following a meeting with an alcoholic friend who had been in contact with the Oxford Groups of that day.  He had also been greatly helped by the late Dr. William D. Silkworth, a New York specialist in alcoholism who is now accounted no less than a medical saint by A.A. members, and whose story of the early days of our Society appears in the next pages.  From this doctor, the broker had learned the grave nature of alcoholism.  Though he could not accept all the tenets of the Oxford Groups, he was convinced of the need for moral inventory, confession of personality defects, restitution to those harmed, helpfulness to others, and the necessity of belief in and dependence upon God.

January 17 – AM          Page 73, Into Action, Chapter 6

      Psychologists are inclined to agree with us.  We have spent thousands of dollars for examinations.  We know but few instances where we have given these doctors a fair break.  We have seldom told them the whole truth nor have we followed their advice.  Unwilling to be honest with these sympathetic men, we were honest with no one else.  Small wonder many in the medical profession have a low opinion of alcoholics and their chance for recovery!

January 17 – PM          Page 59-60, How It Works, Chapter 5

      Half measures availed us nothing.  We stood at the turning point.  We asked His protection and care with complete abandon.
Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery:

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable. The Principle is Honesty
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.  The Principle is Hope
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.  The Principle is Faith
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. The Principle is Courage
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. The Principle is Integrity
6. We’re entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. The Principle is Willingness
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.  The Principle is Humility
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.  The Principle is Brotherly Love
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.  The Principle is Justice
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.  The Principle is Perseverance
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.  The Principle is Spiritual Awareness
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.  The Principle is Service

January 18 – AM          Page 90, Working With Others, Chapter 7

      Sometimes it is wise to wait till he goes on a binge.  The family may object to this, but unless he is in a dangerous physical condition, it is better to risk it.  Don’t deal with him when he is very drunk, unless he is ugly and the family needs your help.  Wait for the end of the spree, or at least for a lucid interval.  Then let his family or a friend ask him if he wants to quit for good and if he would go to any extreme to do so.  If he says yes, then his attention should be drawn to you as a person who has recovered.  You should be described to him as one of a fellowship who, as part of their own recovery, try to help others and who will be glad to talk to him if he cares to see you.

January 18 – PM          Page 105, To Wives, Chapter 8

      Our loyalty and the desire that our husbands hold up their heads and be like other men have begotten all sorts of predicaments.  We have been unselfish and self-sacrificing.  We have told innumerable lies to protect our pride and our husbands’ reputations.  We have prayed, we have begged, we have been patient.  We have struck out viciously.  We have run away.  We have been hysterical.  We have been terror stricken.  We have sought sympathy.  We have had retaliatory love affairs with other men.
Our homes have been battle-grounds many an evening.  In the morning we have kissed and made up.  Our friends have counseled chucking the men and we have done so with finality, only to be back in a little while hoping, always hoping.  Our men have sworn great solemn oaths that they were through drinking forever.  We have believed them when no one else could or would.  Then, in days, weeks, or months, a fresh outburst.

January 19 – AM          Page 171, Doctor Bob’s Nightmare, Part I

DOCTOR BOB’S NIGHTMARE

      A co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous.  The birth of our Society dates from his first day of permanent sobriety, June 10, 1935.
To 1950, the year of his death, he carried the A.A. message to more than 5,000 alcoholic men and women, and to all these he gave his medical services without thought of charge.
In this prodigy of service, he was well assisted by Sister Ignatia at St. Thomas Hospital in Akron, Ohio, one of the greatest friends our Fellowship will ever know.

January 19 – PM          Page 30-31, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

      We are like men who have lost their legs; they never grow new ones.  Neither does there appear to be any kind of treatment which will make alcoholics of our kind like other men.  We have tried every imaginable remedy.  In some instances there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse.  Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree there is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasn’t done so yet.

January 20 – AM          Page 124, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

      This painful past may be of infinite value to other families still struggling with their problem.  We think each family which has been relieved owes something to those who have not, and when the occasion requires, each member of it should be only too willing to bring former mistakes, no matter how grievous, out of their hiding places.  Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing which makes life seem so worth while to us now.  Cling to the thought that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have—the key to life and happiness for others.  With it you can avert death and misery for them.

January 20 – PM          Page 567, Spiritual Experience, Appendix II

II
SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE

      The terms “spiritual experience” and “spiritual awakening” are used many times in this book which, upon careful reading, shows that the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms.
Yet it is true that our first printing gave many readers the impression that these personality changes, or religious experiences, must be in the nature of sudden and spectacular upheavals.  Happily for everyone, this conclusion is erroneous.

January 21 – AM          Page 3, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

      For the next few years fortune threw money and applause my way.  I had arrived.  My judgment and ideas were followed by many to the tune of paper millions.  The great boom of the late twenties was seething and swelling.  Drink was taking an important and exhilarating part in my life.  There was loud talk in the jazz places uptown.  Everyone spent in thousands and chattered in millions.  Scoffers could scoff and be damned.  I made a host of fair-weather friends.
My drinking assumed more serious proportions, continuing all day and almost every night.  The remonstrances of my friends terminated in a row and I became a lone wolf. There were many unhappy scenes in our sumptuous apartment.  There had been no real infidelity, for loyalty to my wife, helped at times by extreme drunkenness, kept me out of those scrapes.

January 21 – PM           Page 73-74, Into Action, Chapter 6

      We must be entirely honest with somebody if we expect to live long or happily in this world.  Rightly and naturally, we think well before we choose the person or persons with whom to take this intimate and confidential step.  Those of us belonging to a religious denomination which requires confession must, and of course, will want to go to the properly appointed authority whose duty it is to receive it.  Though we have no religious connection, we may still do well to talk with someone ordained by an established religion.  We often find such a person quick to see and understand our problem.  Of course, we sometimes encounter people who do not understand alcoholics.

January 22 – AM          Page 152, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

      We have shown how we got out from under.  You say, “Yes, I’m willing.  But am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum, like some righteous people I see?  I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I?  Have you a sufficient substitute?”
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that.  It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous.  There you will find release from care, boredom and worry.  Your imagination will be fired.  Life will mean something at last.  The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead.  Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you.

January 22 – PM          Page xi, Preface

      THIS IS the third edition of the book “Alcoholics Anonymous.”  The first edition appeared in April 1939, and in the following sixteen years, more than 300,000 copies went into circulation.  The second edition, published in 1955, reached a total of more than 1,150,000 copies.
Because this book has become the basic text for our Society and has helped such large numbers of alcoholic men and women to recovery, there exists a sentiment against any radical changes being made in it.  Therefore, the first portion of this volume, describing the A.A. recovery program, has been left untouched in the course of revisions made for both the second and the third editions.  The section called “The Doctor’s Opinion” has been kept intact, just as it was originally written in 1939 by the late Dr. William D. Silkworth, our Society’s great medical benefactor.

January 23 – AM          Page 18, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

      An illness of this sort—and we have come to believe it an illness—involves those about us in a way no other human sickness can.  If a person has cancer all are sorry for him and no one is angry or hurt.  But not so with the alcoholic illness, for with it there goes annihilation of all the things worth while in life.  It engulfs all whose lives touch the sufferer’s.  It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents—anyone can increase the list.

January 23 – PM          Page 45-46, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

      We know how he feels.  We have shared his honest doubt and prejudice.  Some of us have been violently anti-religious.  To others, the word “God” brought up a particular idea of Him with which someone had tried to impress them during childhood.  Perhaps we rejected this particular conception because it seemed inadequate.  With that rejection we imagined we had abandoned the God idea entirely.  We were bothered with the thought that faith and dependence upon a Power beyond ourselves was somewhat weak, even cowardly.  We look upon this world of warring individuals, warring theological systems, and inexplicable calamity, with deep skepticism.  We looked askance at many individuals who claimed to be godly.  How could a Supreme Being have anything to do with it all?  And who could comprehend a Supreme Being anyhow?  Yet, in other moments, we found ourselves thinking, when enchanted by a starlit night, “Who, then, made all this?”  There was a feeling of awe and wonder, but it was fleeting and soon lost.

January 24 – AM          Page xxvi, The Doctor’s Opinion

      The physician who, at our request, gave us this letter, has been kind enough to enlarge upon his views in another statement which follows.  In this statement he confirms what we who have suffered alcoholic torture must believe—that the body of the alcoholic is quite as abnormal as his mind.  It did not satisfy us to be told that we could not control our drinking just because we were maladjusted to life, that we were in full flight from reality, or were outright mental defectives.  These things were true to some extent, in fact, to a considerable extent with some of us.  But we are sure that our bodies were sickened as well.  In our belief, any picture of the alcoholic which leaves out this physical factor is incomplete.
The doctor’s theory that we have an allergy to alcohol interests us.  As laymen, our opinion as to its soundness may, of course, mean little.  But as ex-problem drinkers, we can say that his explanation makes good sense.  It explains many things for which we cannot otherwise account.

January 24 – PM          Page 90-91, Working With Others, Chapter 7

      If he does not want to see you, never force yourself upon him.  Neither should the family hysterically plead with him to do anything, nor should they tell him much about you.  They should wait for the end of his next drinking bout.  You might place this book where he can see it in the interval.  Here no specific rule can be given.  The family must decide these things.  But urge them not to be over-anxious, for that might spoil matters.
Usually the family should not try to tell your story.  When possible, avoid meeting a man through his family.  Approach through a doctor or an institution is a better bet.  If your man needs hospitalization, he should have it, but not forcibly unless he is violent.  Let the doctor, if he will, tell him he has something in the way of a solution.

January 25 – AM          Page xviii, Foreword to Second Edition (1955)

      In the spring of 1940, John D. Rockefeller, Jr. gave a dinner for many of his friends to which he invited A.A. members to tell their stories.  News of this got on the world wires; inquiries poured in again and many people went to the bookstores to get the book “Alcoholics Anonymous.”  By March 1941 the membership had shot up to 2,000.  Then Jack Alexander wrote a feature article in the Saturday Evening Post and placed such a compelling picture of A.A. before the general public that alcoholics in need of help really deluged us. By the close of 1941, A.A. numbered 8,000 members.  The mushrooming process was in full swing. A.A. had become a national institution.

January 25 – PM          Page 60, How It Works, Chapter 5

      Many of us exclaimed, “What an order!  I can’t go through with it.”  Do not be discouraged.  No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles.  We are not saints.  The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines.  The principles we have set down are guides to progress.  We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.
Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:

      (a)          That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.

      (b)          That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.

      (c)          That God could and would if He were sought.

January 26 – AM          Page 172, Doctor Bob’s Nightmare, Part I

      After high school came four years in one of the best colleges in the country where drinking seemed to be a major extra-curricular activity.  Almost everyone seemed to do it.  I did it more and more, and had lots of fun without much grief, either physical or financial.  I seemed to be able to snap back the next morning better than most of my fellow drinkers, who were cursed (or perhaps blessed) with a great deal of morning-after nausea.  Never once in my life have I had a headache, which fact leads me to believe that I was an alcoholic almost from the start.  My whole life seemed to be centered around doing what I wanted to do, without regard for the rights, wishes, or privileges of anyone else; a state of mind which became more and more predominant as the years passed.  I was graduated “summa cum laude” in the eyes of the drinking fraternity, but not in the eyes of the Dean.

January 26 – PM          Page 74, Into Action, Chapter 6

      If we cannot or would rather not do this, we search our acquaintance for a close-mouthed, understanding friend.  Perhaps our doctor or psychologist will be the person.  It may be one of our own family, but we cannot disclose anything to our wives or our parents which will hurt them and make them unhappy.  We have no right to save our own skin at another person’s expense.  Such parts of our story we tell to someone who will understand, yet be unaffected.  The rule is we must be hard on ourself, but always considerate of others.

January 27 – AM          Page 105-106, To Wives, Chapter 8

      We seldom had friends at our homes, never knowing how or when the men of the house would appear.  We could make few social engagements.  We came to live almost alone.  When we were invited out, our husbands sneaked so many drinks that they spoiled the occasion.  If, on the other hand, they took nothing, their self-pity made them killjoys.
There was never financial security.  Positions were always in jeopardy or gone.  An armored car could not have brought the pay envelopes home.  The checking account melted like snow in June.
Sometimes there were other women.  How heartbreaking was this discovery; how cruel to be told they understood our men as we did not!

January 27 – PM          Page 31, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

      Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class.  By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic.  If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right-about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him.  Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people!
Here are some of the methods we have tried:  Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums—we could increase the list ad infinitum.

January 28 – AM          Page 124-125, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

      It is possible to dig up past misdeeds so they become a blight, a veritable plague.  For example, we know of situations in which the alcoholic or his wife have had love affairs.  In the first flush of spiritual experience they forgave each other and drew closer together.  The miracle of reconciliation was at hand.  Then, under one provocation or another, the aggrieved one would unearth the old affair and angrily cast its ashes about.  A few of us have had these growing pains and they hurt a great deal.  Husbands and wives have sometimes been obliged to separate for a time until new perspective, new victory over hurt pride could be rewon.  In most cases, the alcoholic survived this ordeal without relapse, but not always.  So we think that unless some good and useful purpose is to be served, past occurrences should not be discussed.

January 28 – PM          Page 3-4, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

      In 1929 I contracted golf fever.  We went at once to the country, my wife to applaud while I started out to overtake Walter Hagen.  Liquor caught up with me much faster than I came up behind Walter.  I began to be jittery in the morning.  Golf permitted drinking every day and every night.  It was fun to carom around the exclusive course which had inspired such awe in me as a lad.  I acquired the impeccable coat of tan one sees upon the well-to-do.  The local banker watched me whirl fat checks in and out of his till with amused skepticism.

January 29 – AM          Page 152-153, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

      You are going to meet these new friends in your own community.  Near you, alcoholics are dying helplessly like people in a sinking ship.  If you live in a large place, there are hundreds.  High and low, rich and poor, these are future fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous.  Among them you will make lifelong friends.  You will be bound to them with new and wonderful ties, for you will escape disaster together and you will commence shoulder to shoulder your common journey.  Then you will know what it means to give of yourself that others may survive and rediscover life.  You will learn the full meaning of “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”

January 29 – PM           Page 95, Working With Others, Chapter 7

      If he is not interested in your solution, if he expects you to act only as a banker for his financial difficulties or a nurse for his sprees, you may have to drop him until he changes his mind.  This he may do after he gets hurt some more.
If he is sincerely interested and wants to see you again, ask him to read this book in the interval.  After doing that, he must decide for himself whether he wants to go on.  He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends.  If he is to find God, the desire must come from within.
If he thinks he can do the job in some other way, or prefers some other spiritual approach, encourage him to follow his own conscience.  We have no monopoly on God; we merely have an approach that worked with us.  But point out that we alcoholics have much in common and that you would like, in any case, to be friendly.  Let it go at that.

January 30 – AM          Page 60-61, How It Works, Chapter 5

      Being convinced, we were at Step Three, which is that we decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understood Him.  Just what do we mean by that, and just what do we do?
The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success.  On that basis we are almost always in collision with something or somebody, even though our motives are good.  Most people try to live by self-propulsion.  Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way.  If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great.  Everybody, including himself, would be pleased.  Life would be wonderful.  In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous.  He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing.  On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest.  But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits.

January 30 – PM          Page 74-75, Into Action, Chapter 6

      Notwithstanding the great necessity for discussing ourselves with someone, it may be one is so situated that there is no suitable person available.  If that is so, this step may be postponed, only, however, if we hold ourselves in complete readiness to go through with it at the first opportunity.  We say this because we are very anxious that we talk to the right person.  It is important that he be able to keep a confidence; that he fully understand and approve what we are driving at; that he will not try to change our plan.  But we must not use this as a mere excuse to postpone.
When we decide who is to hear our story, we waste no time.  We have a written inventory and we are prepared for a long talk.  We explain to our partner what we are about to do and why we have to do it.  He should realize that we are engaged upon a life-and-death errand.  Most people approached in this way will be glad to help; they will be honored by our confidence.

January 31 – AM          Page 46, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

      Yes, we of agnostic temperament have had these thoughts and experiences.  Let us make haste to reassure you.  We found that as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend that Power, which is God.

January 31 – PM          Page 21-22, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

      Here is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control.  He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking.  He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He is seldom mildly intoxicated.  He is always more or less insanely drunk.  His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little.  He may be one of the finest fellows in the world.  Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously anti-social.  He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept.  He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish.  He often possesses special abilities, skills, and aptitudes, and has a promising career ahead of him.  He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees.  He is the fellow who goes to bed so intoxicated he ought to sleep the clock around.  Yet early next morning he searches madly for the bottle he misplaced the night before.  If he can afford it, he may have liquor concealed all over his house to be certain no one gets his entire supply away from him to throw down the wastepipe.  As matters grow worse, he begins to use a combination of high-powered sedative and liquor to quiet his nerves so he can go to work.  Then comes the day when he simply cannot make it and gets drunk all over again.  Perhaps he goes to a doctor who gives him morphine or some sedative with which to taper off.  Then he begins to appear at hospitals and sanitariums.
This is by no means a comprehensive picture of the true alcoholic, as our behavior patterns vary.  But this description should identify him roughly.

Reprinted from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc.

The February Daily Readings from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

February 1 – AM          Page 126-127, The Family Afterwards, Chapter 9

Sometimes mother and children don’t think so.  Having been neglected and misused in the past, they think father owes them more than they are getting.  They want him to make a fuss over them.  They expect him to give them the nice times they used to have before he drank so much, and to show his contrition for what they suffered.  But dad doesn’t give freely of himself.  Resentment grows.  He becomes still less communicative. Sometimes he explodes over a trifle.  The family is mystified.  They criticize, pointing out how he is falling down on his spiritual program.

This sort of thing can be avoided. Both father and the family are mistaken, though each side may have some justification. It is of little use to argue and only makes the impasse worse. The family must realize that dad, though marvelously improved, is still convalescing. They should be thankful he is sober and able to be of this world once more. Let them praise his progress. Let them remember that his drinking wrought all kinds of damage that may take long to repair. If they sense these things, they will not take so seriously his periods of crankiness, depression, or apathy, which will disappear when there is tolerance, love and spiritual understanding.

February 1 – PM          Page 4-5, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

We went to live with my wife’s parents.  I found a job; then lost it as the result of a brawl with a taxi driver.  Mercifully, no one could guess that I was to have no real employment for five years, or hardly draw a sober breath.  My wife began to work in a department store, coming home exhausted to find me drunk.  I became an unwelcome hanger-on at brokerage places.

February 2 – AM          Page 75, Into Action, Chapter 6

We pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past.  Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted.  We can look the world in the eye.  We can be alone at perfect peace and ease.  Our fears fall from us.  We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator.  We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience.  The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly.  We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.

February 2 – PM          Page 91, Working With Others, Chapter 7

See your man alone, if possible.  At first engage in general conversation.  After a while, turn the talk to some phase of drinking.  Tell him enough about your drinking habits, symptoms, and experiences to encourage him to speak of himself.  If he wishes to talk, let him do so.  You will thus get a better idea of how you ought to proceed.  If he is not communicative, give him a sketch of your drinking career up to the time you quit.  But say nothing, for the moment, of how that was accomplished.  If he is in a serious mood dwell on the troubles liquor has caused you, being careful not to moralize or lecture.  If his mood is light, tell him humorous stories of your escapades.  Get him to tell some of his.

February 3 – AM          Page 46, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

Yes, we of agnostic temperament have had these thoughts and experiences.  Let us make haste to reasure you.  We found that as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend that Power, which is God.
Much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another’s conception of God.  Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and to effect a contact with Him.  As soon as we admitted the possible existence of a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps.  We found that God does not make too hard terms with those who seek Him.  To us, the Realm of Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek.  It is open, we believe, to all men.

February 3 – PM          Page xxx, The Doctor’s Opinion

There is the type of man who is unwilling to admit that he cannot take a drink.  He plans various ways of drinking.  He changes his brand or his environment.  There is the type who always believes that after being entirely free from alcohol for a period of time he can take a drink without danger.  There is the manic-depressive type, who is, perhaps, the least understood by his friends, and about whom a whole chapter could be written.
Then there are types entirely normal in every respect except in the effect alcohol has upon them.  They are often able, intelligent, friendly people.
All these, and many others, have one symptom in common:  they cannot start drinking without developing the phenomenon of craving.  This phenomenon, as we have suggested, may be the manifestation of an allergy which differentiates these people, and sets them apart as a distinct entity.  It has never been, by any treatment with which we are familiar, permanently eradicated.  The only relief we have to suggest is entire abstinence.

February 4 – AM          Page 61, How It Works, Chapter 5

What usually happens?  The show doesn’t come off very well.  He begins to think life doesn’t treat him right.  He decides to exert himself more.  He becomes, on the next occasion, still more demanding or gracious, as the case may be.  Still the play does not suit him.  Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame.  He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying.  What is his basic trouble?  Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind?  Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well?  Is it not evident to all the rest of the players that these are the things he wants?  And do not his actions make each of them wish to retaliate, snatching all they can get out of the show?  Is he not, even in his best moments, a producer of confusion rather than harmony?

February 4 – PM          Page 4, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

Abruptly in October 1929 hell broke loose on the New York stock exchange.  After one of those days of inferno, I wobbled from a hotel bar to a brokerage office.  It was eight o’clock—five hours after the market closed.  The ticker still clattered.  I was staring at an inch of the tape which bore the inscription XYZ-32.  It had been 52 that morning.  I was finished and so were many friends.  The papers reported men jumping to death from the towers of High Finance.  That disgusted me.  I would not jump.  I went back to the bar.  My friends had dropped several million since ten o’clock—so what?  Tomorrow was another day.  As I drank, the old fierce determination to win came back.
Next morning I telephoned a friend in Montreal.  He had plenty of money left and thought I had better go to Canada.  By the following spring we were living in our accustomed style.  I felt like Napoleon returning from Elba.  No St. Helena for me!  But drinking caught up with me again and my generous friend had to let me go.  This time we stayed broke.

February 5 – AM          Page 106, To Wives, Chapter 8

The bill collectors, the sheriffs, the angry taxi drivers, the policemen, the bums, the pals, and even the ladies they sometimes brought home—our husbands thought we were so inhospitable.  “Joykiller, nag, wet blanket”—that’s what they said.  Next day they would be themselves again and we would forgive and try to forget.
We have tried to hold the love of our children for their father.  We have told small tots that father was sick, which was much nearer the truth than we realized.  They struck the children, kicked out door panels, smashed treasured crockery, and ripped the keys out of pianos.  In the midst of such pandemonium they may have rushed out threatening to live with the other woman forever.  In desperation, we have even got tight ourselves—the drunk to end all drunks.  The unexpected result was that our husbands seemed to like it.

February 5 – PM          Page 125, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few skeletons in the closet.  Everyone knows about the others’ alcoholic troubles.  This is a condition which, in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of other people, and a tendency to take advantage of intimate information.  Among us, these are rare occurrences.  We do talk about each other a great deal, but we almost invariably temper such talk by a spirit of love and tolerance.

February 6 – AM          Page 18-19, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

That the man who is making the approach has had the same difficulty, that he obviously knows what he is talking about, that his whole deportment shouts at the new prospect that he is a man with a real answer, that he has no attitude of Holier Than Thou, nothing whatever except the sincere desire to be helpful; that there are no fees to pay, no axes to grind, no people to please, no lectures to be endured—these are the conditions we have found most effective.  After such an approach many take up their beds and walk again.

February 6 – PM          Page 75-76, Into Action, Chapter 6

Returning home we find a place where we can be quiet for an hour, carefully reviewing what we have done.  We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better.  Taking this book down from our shelf we turn to the page which contains the twelve steps.  Carefully reading the first five proposals we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building an arch through which we shall walk a free man at last.  Is our work solid so far?  Are the stones properly in place?  Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation?  Have we tried to make mortar without sand?
If we can answer to our satisfaction, we then look at Step Six.  We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable.  Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable?  Can He now take them all—every one?  If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing.

February 7 – AM          Page 91-92, Working With Others, Chapter 7

When he sees you know all about the drinking game, commence to describe yourself as an alcoholic.  Tell him how baffled you were, how you finally learned that you were sick.  Give him an account of the struggles you made to stop.  Show him the mental twist which leads to the first drink of a spree.  We suggest you do this as we have done it in the chapter on alcoholism.  If he is alcoholic, he will understand you at once.  He will match your mental inconsistencies with some of his own.

February 7 – PM           Page 31-32, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself.  Step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking.  Try to drink and stop abruptly.  Try it more than once.  It will not take long for you to decide, if you are honest with yourself about it.  It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition.

February 8 – AM          Page 153, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more.  How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness?  The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you.  Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come.  The age of miracles is still with us.  Our own recovery proves that!

February 8 – PM          Page 47, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God.  This applies, too, to other spiritual expressions which you find in this book.  Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you.  At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him.  Afterward, we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach.  That was growth, but if we wished to grow we had to begin somewhere.  So we used our own conception, however limited it was.

February 9 – AM          Page 106-107, To Wives, Chapter 8

Perhaps at this point we got a divorce and took the children home to father and mother.  Then we were severely criticized by our husband’s parents for desertion.  Usually we did not leave.  We stayed on and on.  We finally sought employment ourselves as destitution faced us and our families.
We began to ask medical advice as the sprees got closer together.  The alarming physical and mental symptoms, the deepening pall of remorse, depression and inferiority that settled down on our loved ones—these things terrified and distracted us.  As animals on a treadmill, we have patiently and wearily climbed, falling back in exhaustion after each futile effort to reach solid ground.  Most of us have entered the final stage with its commitment to health resorts, sanitariums, hospitals, and jails.  Sometimes there were screaming delirium and insanity.  Death was often near.
Under these conditions we naturally made mistakes.  Some of them rose out of ignorance of alcoholism.  Sometimes we sensed dimly that we were dealing with sick men.  Had we fully understood the nature of the alcoholic illness, we might have behaved differently.

February 9 – PM          Page 61-62, How It Works, Chapter 5

Our actor is self-centered—ego-centric, as people like to call it nowadays.  He is like the retired business man who lolls in the Florida sunshine in the winter complaining of the sad state of the nation; the minister who sighs over the sins of the twentieth century; politicians and reformers who are sure all would be Utopia if the rest of the world would only behave; the outlaw safe cracker who thinks society has wronged him; and the alcoholic who has lost all and is locked up.  Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity?

February 10 – AM          Page 125, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

Another principle we observe carefully is that we do not relate intimate experiences of another person unless we are sure he would approve.  We find it better, when possible, to stick to our own stories.  A man may criticize or laugh at himself and it will affect others favorably, but criticism or ridicule coming from another often produces the contrary effect.  Members of a family should watch such matters carefully, for one careless, inconsiderate remark has been known to raise the very devil.  We alcoholics are sensitive people.  It takes some of us a long time to outgrow that serious handicap.

February 10 – PM          Page xvi-xvii, Foreword To Second Edition (1955)

Prior to his journey to Akron, the broker had worked hard with many alcoholics on the theory that only an alcoholic could help an alcoholic, but he had succeeded only in keeping sober himself.  The broker had gone to Akron on a business venture which had collapsed, leaving him greatly in fear that he might start drinking again.  He suddenly realized that in order to save himself he must carry his message to another alcoholic.  That alcoholic turned out to be the Akron physician.
This physician had repeatedly tried spiritual means to resolve his alcoholic dilemma but had failed.  But when the broker gave him Dr. Silkworth’s description of alcoholism and its hopelessness, the physician began to pursue the spiritual remedy for his malady with a willingness he had never before been able to muster.  He sobered, never to drink again up to the moment of his death in 1950.  This seemed to prove that one alcoholic could affect another as no nonalcoholic could.  It also indicated that strenuous work, one alcoholic with another, was vital to permanent recovery.

February 11 – AM          Page 5, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

Liquor ceased to be a luxury; it became a necessity.  “Bathtub” gin, two bottles a day, and often three, got to be routine.  Sometimes a small deal would net a few hundred dollars, and I would pay my bills at the bars and delicatessens.  This went on endlessly, and I began to waken very early in the morning shaking violently.  A tumbler full of gin followed by half a dozen bottles of beer would be required if I were to eat any breakfast.  Nevertheless, I still thought I could control the situation, and there were periods of sobriety which renewed my wife’s hope.
Gradually things got worse.  The house was taken over by the mortgage holder, my mother-in-law died, my wife and father-in-law became ill.
Then I got a promising business opportunity.  Stocks were at the low point of 1932, and I had somehow formed a group to buy.  I was to share generously in the profits.  Then I went on a prodigious bender, and the chance vanished.

February 11 – PM          Page 19, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

None of us makes a sole vocation of this work, nor do we think its effectiveness would be increased if we did.  We feel that elimination of our drinking is but a beginning. A much more important demonstration of our principles lies before us in our respective homes, occupations and affairs.  All of us spend much of our spare time in the sort of effort which we are going to describe.  A few are fortunate enough to be so situated that they can give nearly all their time to the work.

February 12 – AM          Page 76, Into Action, Chapter 6

When ready, we say something like this:  “My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad.  I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.  Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding.  Amen.”  We have then completed Step Seven.

February 12 – PM          Page 92, Working With Others, Chapter 7

If you are satisfied that he is a real alcoholic, begin to dwell on the hopeless feature of the malady.  Show him, from your own experience, how the queer mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power.  Don’t, at this stage, refer to this book, unless he has seen it and wishes to discuss it.  And be careful not to brand him as an alcoholic.  Let him draw his own conclusion.  If he sticks to the idea that he can still control his drinking, tell him that possibly he can—if he is not too alcoholic.  But insist that if he is severely afflicted, there may be little chance he can recover by himself.

February 13 – AM          Page 32-33, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

Though there is no way of proving it, we believe that early in our drinking careers most of us could have stopped drinking.  But the difficulty is that few alcoholics have enough desire to stop while there is yet time.  We have heard of a few instances where people, who showed definite signs of alcoholism, were able to stop for a long period because of an overpowering desire to do so.  Here is one.

A man of thirty was doing a great deal of spree drinking. He was very nervous in the morning after these bouts and quieted himself with more liquor. He was ambitious to succeed in business, but saw that he would get nowhere if he drank at all. Once he started, he had no control whatever. He made up his mind until he had been successful in business and had retired, he would not touch another drop. An exceptional man, he remained bone dry for twenty-fives years and retired at the age of fifty-five, after successful and happy business career. Then he fell victim to a belief which practically every alcoholic has – that has long period of sobriety and self-discipline had qualified him to drink as other men. Out came his carpet slippers and a bottle. In two months he was in a hospital, puzzled and humiliated. He tried to regulate his drinking for a while, making several trips to the hospital meantime. Then, gathering all his forces, he attempted to stop altogether and found he could not. Every means of solving his problem which money could buy was at his disposal. Every attempt failed. Though a robust man at retirement, he went to pieces quickly and was dead within four years.

February 13 – PM          Page 153, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions.  Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on.  They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.

February 14 – AM          Page 47, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

We needed to ask ourselves but one short question.  “Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?”  As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built.*

*Please be sure to read Appendix II on “Spiritual Experience.”

February 14 – PM          Page xxvii, The Doctor’s Opinion

The doctor writes:

The subject presented in this book seems to me to be of paramount importance to those afflicted with alcoholic addiction.
I say this after many years’ experience as Medical Director of one of the oldest hospitals in the country treating alcoholic and drug addiction.
There was, therefore, a sense of real satisfaction when I was asked to contribute a few words on a subject which is covered in such masterly detail in these pages.
We doctors have realized for a long time that some form of moral psychology was of urgent importance to alcoholics, but its application presented difficulties beyond our conception.  What with our ultra-modern standards, our scientific approach to everything, we are perhaps not well equipped to apply the powers of good that lie outside our synthetic knowledge.

February 15 – AM          Page 62, How It Works, Chapter 5

Selfishness—self-centeredness!  That, we think, is the root of our troubles.  Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate.  Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.

February 15 – PM          Page 107, To Wives, Chapter 8

How could men who loved their wives and children be so unthinking, so callous, so cruel?  There could be no love in such persons, we thought.  And just as we were being convinced of their heartlessness, they would surprise us with fresh resolves and new attentions.  For a while they would be their old sweet selves, only to dash the new structure of affection to pieces once more.  Asked why they commenced to drink again, they would reply with some silly excuse, or none.  It was so baffling, so heartbreaking.  Could we have been so mistaken in the men we married?  When drinking, they were strangers.  Sometimes they were so inaccessible that it seemed as though a great wall had been built around them.

February 16 – AM          Page 122, The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

OUR WOMEN FOLK have suggested certain attitudes a wife may take with the husband who is recovering.  Perhaps they created the impression that he is to be wrapped in cotton wool and placed on a pedestal.  Successful readjustment means the opposite.  All members of the family should meet upon the common ground of tolerance, understanding and love.  This involves a process of deflation.  The alcoholic, his wife, his children, his “in-laws,” each one is likely to have fixed ideas about the family’s attitude towards himself or herself.  Each is interested in having his or her wishes respected.  We find the more one member of the family demands that the others concede to him, the more resentful they become.  This makes for discord and unhappiness.
And why?  Is it not because each wants to play the lead?  Is not each trying to arrange the family show to his liking?  Is he not unconsciously trying to see what he can take from the family life rather than give?

February 16 – PM          Page 175-176, Doctor Bob’s Nightmare, Part I

During the next few years, I developed two distinct phobias.  One was the fear of not sleeping, and the other was the fear of running out of liquor.  Not being a man of means, I knew that if I did not stay sober enough to earn money, I would run out of liquor.  Most of the time, therefore, I did not take the morning drink which I craved so badly, but instead would fill up on large doses of sedatives to quiet the jitters, which distressed me terribly.  Occasionally, I would yield to the morning craving, but if I did, it would be only a few hours before I would be quite unfit for work.  This would lessen my chances of smuggling some home that evening, which in turn would mean a night of futile tossing around in bed followed by a morning of unbearable jitters.  During the subsequent fifteen years I had sense enough never to go to the hospital if I had been drinking, and very seldom did I receive patients.  I would sometimes hide out in one of the clubs of which I was a member, and had the habit at times of registering at a hotel under a fictitious name.  But my friends usually found me and I would go home if they promised that I should not be scolded.

February 17 – AM          Page xiii, Foreword to First Edition (1939)

FOREWORD TO FIRST EDITION

This is the Foreword as it appeared in the first
printing of the first edition in 1939

WE, OF Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body.  To show other alcoholics precisely how we have recovered is the main purpose of this book.  For them, we hope these pages will prove so convincing that no further authentication will be necessary.  We think this account of our experiences will help everyone to better understand the alcoholic.  Many do not comprehend that the alcoholic is a very sick person.  And besides, we are sure that our way of living has its advantages for all.

February 17 – PM          Page 76, Into Action, Chapter 6

Now we need more action, without which we find that “Faith without works is dead.”  Let’s look at Steps Eight and Nine.  We have a list of all persons we have harmed and to whom we are willing to make amends.  We made it when we took inventory.  We subjected ourselves to a drastic self-appraisal.  Now we go out to our fellows and repair the damage done in the past.  We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self-will and run the show ourselves.  If we haven’t the will to do this, we ask until it comes.  Remember it was agreed at the beginning we would go to any lengths for victory over alcohol.

February 18 – AM          Page 33, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

This case contains a powerful lesson.  Most of us have believed that if we remained sober for a long stretch, we could thereafter drink normally.  But here is a man who at fifty-five years found he was just where he had left off at thirty.  We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again:  “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.”  Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever.  If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol.
Young people may be encouraged by this man’s experience to think that they can stop, as he did, on their own will power.  We doubt if many of them can do it, because none will really want to stop, and hardly one of them, because of the peculiar mental twist already acquired, will find he can win out.  Several of our crowd, men of thirty or less, had been drinking only a few years, but they found themselves as helpless as those who had been drinking twenty years.

February 18 – PM          Page 5-6, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

I woke up.  This had to be stopped.  I saw I could not take so much as one drink.  I was through forever.  Before then, I had written lots of sweet promises, but my wife happily observed that this time I meant business.  And so I did.
Shortly afterward I came home drunk.  There had been no fight.  Where had been my high resolve?  I simply didn’t know.  It hadn’t even come to mind.  Someone had pushed a drink my way, and I had taken it.  Was I crazy?  I began to wonder, for such an appalling lack of perspective seemed near being just that.
Renewing my resolve, I tried again.  Some time passed, and confidence began to be replaced by cocksureness.  I could laugh at the gin mills.  Now I had what it takes!  One day I walked into a cafe to telephone.  In no time I was beating on the bar asking myself how it happened.  As the whisky rose to my head I told myself I would manage better next time, but I might as well get good and drunk then.  And I did.

February 19 – AM          Page 92-93, Working With Others, Chapter 7

Continue to speak of alcoholism as an illness, a fatal malady.  Talk about the conditions of body and mind which accompany it.  Keep his attention focussed mainly on your personal experience.  Explain that many are doomed who never realize their predicament.  Doctors are rightly loath to tell alcoholic patients the whole story unless it will serve some good purpose.  But you may talk to him about the hopelessness of alcoholism because you offer a solution.  You will soon have your friend admitting he has many, if not all, of the traits of the alcoholic.  If his own doctor is willing to tell him that he is alcoholic, so much the better.  Even though your protégé may not have entirely admitted his condition, he has become very curious to know how you got well.  Let him ask you that question, if he will.  Tell him exactly what happened to you.  Stress the spiritual feature freely.  If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God.  He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him.  The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles.

February 19 – PM          Page 19, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

If we keep on the way we are going there is little doubt that much good will result, but the surface of the problem would hardly be scratched.  Those of us who live in large cities are overcome by the reflection that close by hundreds are dropping into oblivion every day.  Many could recover if they had the opportunity we have enjoyed.  How then shall we present that which has been so freely given us?
We have concluded to publish an anonymous volume setting forth the problem as we see it.  We shall bring to the task our combined experience and knowledge.  This should suggest a useful program for anyone concerned with a drinking problem.

February 20 – AM          Page 153-154, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

In the chapter “Working With Others” you gathered an idea of how we approach and aid others to health.  Suppose now that through you several families have adopted this way of life.  You will want to know more of how to proceed from that point.  Perhaps the best way of treating you to a glimpse of your future will be to describe the growth of the fellowship among us.  Here is a brief account:
Years ago, in 1935, one of our number made a journey to a certain western city.  From a business standpoint, his trip came off badly.  Had he been successful in his enterprise, he would have been set on his feet financially which, at the time, seemed vitally important.  But his venture wound up in a law suit and bogged down completely.  The proceeding was shot through with much hard feeling and controversy.
Bitterly discouraged, he found himself in a strange place, discredited and almost broke.  Still physically weak, and sober but a few months, he saw that his predicament was dangerous.  He wanted so much to talk with someone, but whom?

February 20 – PM          Page 107-108, To Wives, Chapter 8

And even if they did not love their families, how could they be so blind about themselves?  What had become of their judgment, their common sense, their will power?  Why could they not see that drink meant ruin to them?  Why was it, when these dangers were pointed out that they agreed, and then got drunk again immediately?
These are some of the questions which race through the mind of every woman who has an alcoholic husband.  We hope this book has answered some of them.  Perhaps your husband has been living in that strange world of alcoholism where everything is distorted and exaggerated.  You can see that he really does love you with his better self.  Of course, there is such a thing as incompatibility, but in nearly every instance the alcoholic only seems to be unloving and inconsiderate; it is usually because he is warped and sickened that he says and does these appalling things.  Today most of our men are better husbands and fathers than ever before.

February 21 – AM          Page 47, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

That was great news to us, for we had assumed we could not make use of spiritual principles unless we accepted many things on faith which seemed difficult to believe.  When people presented us with spiritual approaches, how frequently did we all say, “I wish I had what that man has.  I’m sure it would work if I could only believe as he believes.  But I cannot accept as surely true the many articles of faith which are so plain to him.”  So it was comforting to learn that we could commence at a simpler level.

February 21 – PM          Page 139, To Employers, Chapter 10

If you desire to help it might be well to disregard your own drinking, or lack of it. Whether you are a hard drinker, a moderate drinker or a teetotaler, you may have some pretty strong opinions, perhaps prejudices.  Those who drink moderately may be more annoyed with an alcoholic than a total abstainer would be.  Drinking occasionally, and understanding your own reactions, it is possible for you to become quite sure of many things which, so far as the alcoholic is concerned, are not always so.  As a moderate drinker, you can take your liquor or leave it alone.  Whenever you want to, you control your drinking. Of an evening, you can go on a mild bender, get up in the morning, shake your head and go to business.  To you, liquor is no real problem.  You cannot see why it should be to anyone else, save the spineless and stupid.
When dealing with an alcoholic, there may be a natural annoyance that a man could be so weak, stupid and irresponsible.  Even when you understand the malady better, you may feel this feeling rising.

February 22 – AM          Page xvii, Foreword to Second Edition (1955)

Hence the two men set to work almost frantically upon alcoholics arriving in the ward of the Akron City Hospital.  Their very first case, a desperate one, recovered immediately and became A.A. number three.  He never had another drink.  This work at Akron continued through the summer of 1935.  There were many failures, but there was an occasional heartening success.  When the broker returned to New York in the fall of 1935, the first A.A. group had actually been formed, though no one realized it at the time.
A second small group promptly took shape at New York, to be followed in 1937 with the start of a third at Cleveland.  Besides these, there were scattered alcoholics who had picked up the basic ideas in Akron or New York who were trying to form groups in other cities.  By late 1937, the number of members having substantial sobriety time behind them was sufficient to convince the membership that a new light had entered the dark world of the alcoholic.

February 22 – PM          Page 62, How It Works, Chapter 5

So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making.  They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn’t think so.  Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness.  We must, or it kills us!  God makes that possible.  And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid.  Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to.  Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power.  We had to have God’s help.

February 23 – AM          Page 126,  The Family Afterward, Chapter 9

We think it dangerous if he rushes headlong at his economic problem.  The family will be affected also, pleasantly at first, as they feel their money troubles are about to be solved, then not so pleasantly as they find themselves neglected.  Dad may be tired at night and preoccupied by day.  He may take small interest in the children and may show irritation when reproved for his delinquencies.  If not irritable, he may seem dull and boring, not gay and affectionate as the family would like him to be.  Mother may complain of inattention.  They are all disappointed, and often let him feel it.  Beginning with such complaints, a barrier arises.  He is straining every nerve to make up for lost time.  He is striving to recover fortune and reputation and feels he is doing very well.

February 23 – PM          Page 568, Spiritual Experience, Appendix II

Most of us think this awareness of a Power greater than ourselves is the essence of spiritual experience.  Our more religious members call it “God-consciousness.”
Most emphatically we wish to say that any alcoholic capable of honestly facing his problems in the light of our experience can recover, provided he does not close his mind to all spiritual concepts.  He can only be defeated by an attitude of intolerance or belligerent denial.
We find that no one need have difficulty with the spirituality of the program.  Willingness, honesty and open mindedness are the essentials of recovery.  But these are indispensable.

February 24 – AM          Page 154-155, A Vision For You, Chapter 11

One dismal afternoon he paced a hotel lobby wondering how his bill was to be paid. At one end of the room stood a glass covered directory of local churches.  Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar.  He could see the gay crowd inside.  In there he would find companionship and release.  Unless he took some drinks, he might not have the courage to scrape an acquaintance and would have a lonely week-end.
Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hopefully at a table, a bottle of ginger ale before him?  After all, had he not been sober six months now?  Perhaps he could handle, say, three drinks—no more!  Fear gripped him.  He was on thin ice.  Again it was the old, insidious insanity—that first drink.  With a shiver, he turned away and walked down the lobby to the church directory.  Music and gay chatter still floated to him from the bar.
But what about his responsibilities—his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah—yes, those other alcoholics?  There must be many such in this town.  He would phone a clergyman.  His sanity returned and he thanked God.  Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into a booth and lifted the receiver.

February 24 – PM          Page 93, Working With Others, Chapter 7

When dealing with such a person, you had better use everyday language to describe spiritual principles.  There is no use arousing any prejudice he may have against certain theological terms and conceptions about which he may already be confused.  Don’t raise such issues, no matter what you own convictions are.

February 25 – AM          Page 6, Bill’s Story, Chapter 1

The remorse, horror and hopelessness of the next morning are unforgettable.  The courage to do battle was not there.  My brain raced uncontrollably and there was a terrible sense of impending calamity.  I hardly dared cross the street, lest I collapse and be run down by an early morning truck, for it was scarcely daylight.  An all night place supplied me with a dozen glasses of ale.  My writhing nerves were stilled at last.  A morning paper told me the market had gone to hell again.  Well, so had I.  The market would recover, but I wouldn’t.  That was a hard thought.  Should I kill myself?  No—not now.  Then a mental fog settled down.  Gin would fix that.  So two bottles, and—oblivion.

February 25 – PM          Page 176-177, Doctor Bob’s Nightmare, Part I

If my wife was planning to go out in the afternoon, I would get a large supply of liquor and smuggle it home and hide it in the coal bin, the clothes chute, over door jambs, over beams in the cellar and in cracks in the cellar tile.  I also made use of old trunks and chests, the old can container, and even the ash container.  The water tank on the toilet I never used, because that looked too easy.  I found out later that my wife inspected it frequently.  I used to put eight or twelve ounce bottles of alcohol in a fur lined glove and toss it onto the back airing porch when winter days got dark enough.  My bootlegger had hidden alcohol at the back steps where I could get it at my convenience.  Sometimes I would bring it in my pockets, but they were inspected, and that became too risky.  I used also to put it up in four ounce bottles and stick several in my stocking tops.  This worked nicely until my wife and I went to see Wallace Beery in “Tugboat Annie,” after which the pant-leg and stocking racket were out!

February 26 – AM          Page 19-20, There Is A Solution, Chapter 2

Of necessity there will have to be discussion of matters medical, psychiatric, social, and religious.  We are aware that these matters are, from their very nature, controversial.  Nothing would please us so much as to write a book which would contain no basis for contention or argument.  We shall do our utmost to achieve that ideal.  Most of us sense that real tolerance of other people’s shortcomings and viewpoints and a respect for their opinions are attitudes which make us more useful to others.  Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers, depend upon our constant thought of others and how we may help meet their needs.

February 26 – PM          Page 43, More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3

Once more:  The alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink.  Except in a few rare cases, neither he nor any other human being can provide such a defense.  His defense must come from a Higher Power.

February 27 – AM          Page 108, To Wives, Chapter 8

Try not to condemn your alcoholic husband no matter what he says or does.  He is just another very sick, unreasonable person.  Treat him, when you can, as though he had pneumonia.  When he angers you, remember that he is very ill.
There is an important exception to the foregoing.  We realize some men are thoroughly bad-intentioned, that no amount of patience will make any difference.  An alcoholic of this temperament may be quick to use this chapter as a club over your head.  Don’t let him get away with it.  If you are positive he is one of this type you may feel you had better leave.  Is it right to let him ruin your life and the lives of your children?  Especially when he has before him a way to stop his drinking and abuse if he really wants to pay the price.

February 27 – PM          Page 80-81, Into Action, Chapter 6

The chances are that we have domestic troubles.  Perhaps we are mixed up with women in a fashion we wouldn’t care to have advertised.  We doubt if, in this respect, alcoholics are fundamentally much worse than other people.  But drinking does complicate sex relations in the home.  After a few years with an alcoholic, a wife gets worn out, resentful and uncommunicative.  How could she be anything else?  The husband begins to feel lonely, sorry for himself.  He commences to look around in the night clubs, or their equivalent, for something besides liquor.  Perhaps he is having a secret and exciting affair with “the girl who understands.”  In fairness we must say that she may understand, but what are we going to do about a thing like that?  A man so involved often feels very remorseful at times, especially if he is married to a loyal and courageous girl who has literally gone through hell for him.

February 28 – AM          Page 47-48, We Agnostics, Chapter 4

Besides a seeming inability to accept much on faith, we often found ourselves handicapped by obstinacy, sensitiveness, and unreasoning prejudice.  Many of us have been so touchy that even casual reference to spiritual things made us bristle with antagonism.  This sort of thinking had to be abandoned.  Though some of us resisted, we found no great difficulty in casting aside such feelings.  Faced with alcoholic destruction, we soon became as open minded on spiritual matters as we had tried to be on other questions.  In this respect alcohol was a great persuader.  It finally beat us into a state of reasonableness. Sometimes this was a tedious process; we hope no one else will be prejudiced for as long as some of us were.

February 28 – PM          Page 62, How It Works, Chapter 5

This is the how and why of it.  First of all, we had to quit playing God.  It didn’t work.  Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director.  He is the Principal; we are His agents.  He is the Father, and we are His children.  Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.

Reprinted from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc.

This may be downloaded as an individual document HERE

STEP 12

“HAVING HAD A SPIRITUAL AWAKENING AS THE RESULT OF THESE STEPS, WE TRIED TO CARRY THIS MESSAGE TO ALCOHOLICS, AND TO PRACTICE THESE PRINCIPLES IN ALL OUR AFFAIRS.“

1. Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from addictions as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill (Page 89).

2. Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends-this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives (Page 89).

3. You will be most successful with alcoholics if you do not exhibit any passion for crusade or reform. Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked with you. Offer him friendship and fellowship. Tell him that if he wants to get well you will do anything to help (Page 95).

4. He may be broke and homeless. If he is, you might try to help him about getting a job, or give him a little financial assistance. But you should not deprive your family or creditors of money they should have. Perhaps you will want to take the man into your home for a few days. But be sure you use discretion. Be certain he will be welcomed by your family, and that he is not trying to impose upon you for money, connections, or shelter. Permit that and you only harm him. You will be making it possible for him to be insincere. You may be aiding in his destruction rather than his recovery (Page 96-97).

5. Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be (Page 97).

6. It is not the matter of giving that is in question, but when and how to give. That often makes the difference between failure and success. The minute we put our work on a service plane, the alcoholic commences to rely upon our assistance rather than upon God (Page 98).

7. Job or no job- wife or no wife- we simply do not stop using our addictions so long as we place dependence upon other people ahead of dependence on God. Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house (Page 98).

8. Let no alcoholic say he cannot recover unless he has his family back. This just isn’t so. In some cases the wife will never come back for one reason or another. Remind the prospect that his recovery is not dependent upon people. It is dependent upon his relationship with God (Page 99-100).

9. So our rule is not to avoid a place where there are addictions, if we have a legitimate reason for being there (Page 101).

10. Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. You should not hesitate to visit the most sordid spot on earth on such an errand. Keep on the firing line of life with these motives and God will keep you unharmed (Page 102).

11. After all, our problems were of our own making. Our addictions were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to (Page 103)!

NOTES:

This may be downloaded as an individual document HERE

This may be downloaded as an individual document HERE

STEP 9

“MADE DIRECT AMENDS TO SUCH PEOPLE WHEREVER POSSIBLE, EXCEPT WHEN TO DO SO WOULD INJURE THEM OR OTHERS.”

Now we go out to our fellows and repair the damage done in the past. We attempt to sweep away the debris which has accumulated out of our effort to live on self-will and run the show ourselves. If we haven’t the will to do this, we ask until it comes. Remember it was agreed at the beginning, we would go to any lengths for victory over alcoholism (Page 76).

Consult with a member of your group.

a) The chances are that we have domestic troubles.
b) Most alcoholics owe money.
c) Perhaps we have committed a criminal offence.
d) Employer/business problems.
e) Character assassination.
f) Family

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through.

1. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
2. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
3. We will comprehend the word serenity.
4. We will know peace.
5. We will see how our experience can benefit others.
6. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
7. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
8. Self-seeking will slip away.
9. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
10. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
11. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
12. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us-sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them (Page 76-84).

This may be downloaded as an individual document HERE

STEP 8

“MADE A LIST OF ALL PERSONS WE HAD HARMED, AND BECAME WILLING TO MAKE AMENDS TO THEM ALL.”

We have a list of all persons we have harmed and to whom we are willing to make amends. We made it when we took inventory.

List from Step 4. Add names if any have been missed in Step 4.

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NOTES:

This may be downloaded as an individual document HERE

STEP 7

“HUMBLY ASKED HIM TO REMOVE OUR SHORTCOMINGS”

When ready, we say something like this:

“My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding. Amen.”

We have then completed Step Seven.

Now we need more action, without which we find that “Faith without works is dead.” Let’s look at Steps Eight and Nine (Page 76).

NOTES: